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So I survived Christmas. More importantly, it looks as if I will survive 2021.

I think there are a lot of people who share this sentiment. After all, this time last year I was counting down 2020 with excitement I have not felt in years.

Of course, I fell asleep before midnight, so I have no real way of knowing that 2020 ended and 2021 began. For all I know, Father Time decided to let the year just go on and on. And on.

Has anyone checked to see that Baby New Year 2021 was not given a lollipop by 2020 and he just kept going?

This year I plan on staying up to MAKE sure that the year is done and gone.

I want to be optimistic about 2022. I have goals. Like, beating the Guinness Book of World Records of most cups of coffee drunk in a day.

Or, returning that library book sitting on my shelf I had checked out in 1999. I bet the fine could keep the library going for a year or two.

Last year I had big plans. I was going to climb Mount Everest. Okay, so no I wasn’t. But I was going to clean my gutters and it is about the same.

I wanted to read a few books on my list. Turns out I just read the list.

I am sure that some archeologist somewhere found a lost tomb of some ruler forgotten by time and opened it. There was probably a curse, yet he didn’t listen.

Look at what you have done and gone, Mr. Indiana Jones wannabe.

Going forward into 2022, I have few expectations.

Most of all, I want a quiet year. No drama on the interstellar level. I am worried we will see some asteroids or aliens. Or both. Or maybe the sun will become stuck behind the moon during an eclipse or something.

Nothing on the international, state, or even the local level as far as news.

Overall, I plan on going into 2022 quietly. I am not going to look at anything; I am not going to make eye contact. I am not going to say anything. I am sure as heck not going to touch anything.

Oh, and whichever historian opened the tomb of the cursed ruler just to see what was inside, if you could close it and return the artifacts, the rest of humanity would appreciate it.

Michael Cole is a syndicated columnist that when he is not writing, he is plotting global domination. You can follow him at www.storyoveracup.com